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Adam’s Pick-up Advice

29 November 2009

By Xena, co-author of the book On the Meaning of Adam Lambert

Discussing Adam’s sex appeal, Juneau wrote:

“Adam is post-ironic, man enough to handle the raw emotions and sexuality and walk that delicate line between sentimentality and macho over-compensation…if that makes any sense.”

Xena says…..

It does make sense J. I shake with laughter to think of a man approaching Adam at a party –

“Hey man, you see that beautiful girl over there – the one with the big brown eyes, kissable lips, legs up to th…. Yeah, her.  You have to tell me your secret to getting women so hot they want to tear off their clothes and …… uhuh, rip and toss…yes…. the screaming too!……What do you mean you have no idea – don’t b***s*** me man – TELL ME!!!

O.k., if you won’t tell me, then show me.  I know she’s never met you before, but she just needs to see your picture or hear your voice……No, she doesn’t know you’re here yet, but sure to sniff you out soon, they even know what you smell like. I want, no I need what you’ve got…..don’t say “nothing” and shrug your shoulders at me – is it the way you look at them? the way you smile at them? something about your hair? your accoutrements and other parts? eyeliner? nail polish? speaking French? What?!

On stage, you’re huge, a larger than life sex god, with the thrusts and rolls and all that, but here, sitting on this bar stool, jeans, t-shirt, leather vest, a couple of chains, leather pants, hair’s a mess…o.k. “tousled” and I just know that if she walked by you, that brunette would grab you by the vest, lift a perfectly shaped leg over your thigh, smack herself down on your lap, run her hands up your neck to play with your hair, wiggle herself into a comfortable position, legs around you and kiss you so hard, you’d have whiplash.

That’s what I want……. What if I gave you a million dollars?…. What do you mean this can’t be taught?  Look, you way exceed your catch quota, you don’t even want to keep them and she’s my wife.

Adam's Wicked Kiss

15 Comments leave one →
  1. May 23, 2011 11:07 pm

    Excellent advice. Just had to be retweeted!!


  1. Adam Lambert Daily Update – February 7, 2013 « On the Meaning of Adam Lambert

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