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Glambertinas’ Revelry!

May 27, 2010

This is dedicated to our great Glambertina girlfriend from Glorious Gloria is Mistress of all Adam Lambert references, whose very popular blog keeps everyone in the Glamily informed 24/7.  What you may not know is that Glorious Gloria provided all the timeline information and “bon mots” appearing in our book.  Gloria is the spiritual leader of the Sisterhood. What’s a chakra again?

Excerpt from Chapter 2

Report on Landmark Meeting

Gloria, Xena and Priscilla

Originally posted on July 26, 2009

by Xena

Damn! Gloria beat me! O.K., so I arrive at the mansion in which our mutual friend resides and when she saw my van drive up, she looked out the window – I later discovered that Gloria had been warned by her savvy daughter that I just might be a sixty-five year old man. Voilà – I’m not. I wondered why she looked relieved when I walked-in. Glorious Gloria is the Blonde Bombshell I had envisioned and resplendent in her Adamesque outfit – zipper from top to bottom – great for easy access, tons of metal and flattering to her already great figure. Now I know that when she’s around, I won’t be getting any of the male attention – I hate that. Each of us wore black patent leather strappy sandals and I was in a black and white sundress. Having had to do battle with M-I-L before I arrived, this princess warrior was ready to settle down for an afternoon that felt like we were playing hooky from school, well I can only imagine how that feels, since I never did it.

First – the refreshments – Pomegranate Martinis, which must be a secret recipe since we were not allowed to watch as she prepared them – and what will now be referred to as the “Fruits avec Chocolat Chaud sur Crème Frappé Adam” dessert or breakfast in bed or midnight snack if your nocturnal activities give you an appetite. Strawberries, raspberries, blueberries and pineapple dipped in luscious warm chocolate and then topped with whipped cream.

Gloria arranged the perfect Adam accompaniment as we lounged on the floor, watching her rather complete collection of videos – and here is the amazing thing – she has everything memorized! A veritable bibliothèque in her brain, she is definitely our go-to on a number of details. She knows everything each judge said to Adam after his performance! She quotes Adam before he speaks. Gloria will be preparing “Favourite Quotes from Adam” for us à la “I’m not skerrrrred”.

The other guest, brand new Glambertina is known as Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, has a great sense of humour. Now I will fast forward to when the seminar completely fell apart and I am laughing with tears just recalling it – I think Cilla started it, anyway, I will blame her, since she’s not here yet and don’t tell her what I said.

As we were getting near the end of watching all of Adam’s AI performances on a massive TV and we had drained our martinis, Gloria played “Slow Ride”. Having watched this so many times, my mind wandered and I started to look for things only visible on this huge screen and there it was- there’s no zipper on Adam’s laminated-to-his-body pants.

We rewind, we pause, we do it again and maybe once more, and we’re quite certain about this.  Now we do need verification, a peer review, because of our alcohol level at the time, so please, every one of you must play this video as many times as you need, to say “yes” or “no” to the zipper. Another option would be to take one of the photos of Adam with Alison at the end of the song, blow-up the targeted area, perhaps get a magnifying glass and tell us what you see.

Of course, at the time, engrossed in our analysis of Adam’s various garments, we wondered what might he wear under stretchy pants or trousers. Can’t be boxers, briefs would have obvious VPL and we see that he’s not “commando”. We concluded that it must be some type of thong, probably custom made.  The style of pant also shows up on “Crawl through Fire” and “Crazy” in a lighter-weight fabric, also a source of research. Do you wish you were there? We wished you were there.

We did get some serious analysis in, on Freudian theory and how it might apply to our reaction and subsequent elevated moods and feeling of self-worth, following repeated exposure to Adam. We have been told that men think about sex every 10 seconds? I forget exactly. Also, that they need fewer senses stimulated for arousal than women do.

We think it’s possible that Adam has changed all that for women. We only need one sense at a time — either sight or hearing to become, shall we say – inspired, fueled, fired-up. Watching him and listening to him at the same time, simply reduces the time from exposure to “full speed ahead”. Frankly, we don’t want to be in the room when they do the “three senses” test – it could be “touch” or “smell”, one of our favorites. We would end up sounding like Kara after RoF or Feeling Good.

Now, we are drinking coffee… From Freud, we moved on to the subject of endocrinology – now who among us would have thought that “endocrinology” would show up here. Well, I have been waiting days for an opportunity, so I threw it out there today. The discussion of senses led us to talking about the importance of the level of testosterone in women’s bodies, in order to reach that “multi-sensual” state.

How can Adam, using only our sight and hearing get our pituitary glands to produce this extra testosterone? Do we have any endocrinologists out there who could take a stab at this? I would ask my own, but I’m afraid that I would embarrass her and she would drop me as a patient.

If any of you wishes to challenge my version of events, please feel free to contact Gloria for corroboration.

About the French – ever since I heard Adam use “accoutrements” — French words keeping popping up in my mind.

By xena princess warrior on 06/26/2009 1:35 am


Six hours!? Felt like sixty minutes. Maybe we need a pyjama party.

I meant to include Gloria’s illuminating demonstration of Adam-inspired Chakra vibrations, which brought a fourth dimension to the Adam experience, not to mention the smell. Gloria led us through an exercise to help us really feel those vibes and we did/do.

I told DH and our Daughter who has been in on it all along, about our support group, how it evolved, and my furtive, late night writing. He’s aware of this since I moved my computer into the bedroom and he’s used to my periods of obsessive writing. I explained how I had found this amazing group of brilliant and sensitive women to talk to and how helpful and supportive all of you are to me.

He simply listened as he ate dinner and smiled with a bemused look on his face. He must have had an inkling that something was going on, since I have been happy, more affectionate and demonstrative, patient and accommodating. Laughing more. No complaints from him whatsoever. When we are alone again – I will tell him more.


By xena princess warrior on 06/26/2009 10:21 am

Gloria very generously included us in her story  “I Have Revealed All…” on  Thank you Gloria, the rapid rise in popularity of your blog is a testament to your dedication to our Muse Adam and your own chutzpah!

6 Comments leave one →
  1. annehedonia permalink
    May 27, 2010 11:27 pm

    Well, that was a fun read! You all have such glorious memories of the past year, and it seems to be a time to be revisiting said memories – the anniversary of the AI8 finale…

    The pic from The Zodiac Show – different picture, same costume – my first shock & awe moment viewing the “accoutrement” display. A fellow enthusiast & I took to the notion that the pants had to have been made of Lurex –

    (“Lurex is the brand name for a type of yarn with a metallic appearance. The twine is most commonly a synthetic fibre, onto which an aluminium layer has been vaporised.” ~ quote from Wiki, the source of all true knowledge).

    That’s LURE-x. They lured me. They were (and are) frighteningly alluring. Oh, brother…

    • May 27, 2010 11:43 pm

      Oh, I recall Lure-x very well! stretchy, glittery, but sometimes a bit itchy necessitating the constant adjusting of fabric over flesh. Next Thursday, June 3rd is the first anniversary of the day Allegra Huston’s landmark article appeared on and we have been writing ever since then! Juneau & I have something planned to celebrate the date.

      In the book, this is the second story about the party. That’s why the swear word exclamation – Gloria became impatient for the story and wrote one herself before I wrote this. Please read what she wrote about herself on her blog, more info there.

      Gloria, Priscilla and I have done a road trip to a concert and we will drive to Foxwoods together which will include another party participant, Northern Spirit and my daughter. She’s our token “youth”, photographer and carries my lipstick.

  2. buffy522 permalink
    May 28, 2010 11:31 am

    I have been looking for you for a long time. My first fan fascination started with Adam, but I didn’t hit the web until his final three shove by Ryan. I was so mad, I went to the Idol site. My eyes were opened. All the sites! I Google Alerted him and daily checked for news on him. Then youtube! My God! All the footage on this man already! I kept waiting for the sex tapes. Not in a lurid way, but in a “he blew it” way. And they have never showed up and he denies any. I have been very please about that.
    I started reading blogs. I saw some entries, maybe written by readers of this blog, that got me excited. It was me. It was how I felt. I started to write, but read more response attacking those women harshly. I felt dirty and condemned. I have never expressed my feelings since. I do blog. But only on safe sites like Adam Official o Adam Unofficial Official. But I know there are lots of ages, and sexes on these, so am very cautious.
    Right now, I am feeling anxious about the tour. There is nothing in Texas, where I live. Or anything south of Virginia. My son lives in San Francisco so I thought sure that would work. But after two presale and regular sale failures (not one hit), I learned about the lurid world of scalpers. I had no idea it was such a big business. If you miss the sale, you need to head directly to all these sites and buy what you feel you can afford. Another new concept I’ve learned because of my obsession. But I was confused. There were some great tickets available (maybe) but singles. I was dragging my husband and when I asked if he would still go to SF, without the concert, he was less than supportive. Just blah.
    All of my friends just look at me with questioning and confusion when I talk about these things. No one is interested. Wish I had a buddy to share all the things that I am reading on this site.
    Thanks to anyone who read this ramble. I will be back and enjoying you all.

    • May 28, 2010 11:54 am

      Hi buffy! We are so pleased to welcome you to our Salon. We have come under attack from time to time, even on supposedly safe sites, but have built an immunity to such attempts. In our “Editorials” section are several articles we would recommend you read, starting with “Slings and Arrows of a Risky Business”.

      While we have complete control over anything posted here, it’s a very easy job as we get very, very few comments that we don’t approve.

      Obtaining concert tickets has become a nightmarish situation for so many people and what you are experiencing is so common. On one of our recent Blogtalk Radio shows, our guest Michael Wood is an expert in the music business. We ran out of time to talk about this very issue but he will return so we can discuss it.

      I believe there are more concert dates & locations yet to be announced, so we will say some prayers & send flowers to the Oracle at Delphi to imbue the decision makers with the wisdom to bring the tour to a place hear you and so many other deserving Adam fans.


  3. patricia-lynn permalink
    May 30, 2010 1:20 pm

    Dear Adam sisters great to find and follow your site, we are connected in this magnificent obsession and its good to know I’m not completely nuts.

    I feel confident adam is coming to Texas Buffy! AND you could fly out to SF solo for 1 of those rare tickets and discover a whole bunch of us at the Warfield 7/23 so you would not be alone…I figure, go to as many concerts as you can since Adam’s concerts in the future are not going to be such intimate venues. A fellow Adam lover friend Michele and my son Markus are going and figure floor general admission standing room is best since a. we’ll be on our feet dancing the whole time and b. they were the only tickets still available.
    i got to the warfield in sf last sunday morning before public tickets went on sale(I had no luck with the presales either) and all remaining tickets were sold out within 15 minutes. glad i had the cash on me for 2 tickets @$36 each they were only taking cash for those last GA tickets. Seeing Adam for only $36??? CRAZY. thank you Universe! thankyou Junaeu and Xena, looking forward to your Glamnation Tour coverage.

    To Life! To Adam! To Brilliant Women! Patricia-Lynn

  4. patricia-lynn permalink
    May 30, 2010 1:23 pm

    what does “awaiting moderation” mean…do you want me to moderate it or is that something you do?

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